Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Well, we have had some time to catch our breath and are about to jump back into a cycle again. The last one was a disappointment having to stop in the middle, but hopefully this time we will see better results. I get my new calendar today so hopefully in about a month I will have some happy news to report. I must say my mom was concerned that we were going through another cycle and asked: “what if this doesn’t work? Are you going to be okay?” My reply was “no.”
After having to stop in our last cycle I realized that I’m going to just knock down the wall I’ve built around myself. I had told myself when we started this again that there was a good chance it wouldn’t work and tried to mentally prepare myself for that so it wouldn’t hurt as much and I wouldn’t be as disappointed. If this doesn’t work, I’ll be upset. I’ll cry. I might be a little depressed, but I will be okay. I’m not going to try to psych myself up this time for the “what ifs?” like I did last time. I’m just going to move forward one day at a time and feel what I feel. I know God has a plan for us but I don’t know what that is yet. I don’t know if that includes us having a baby. Whatever it is we are good with it. And I know that going through all of this has continued to shape me into the person I was meant to be and make my priorities in my life even more clear. Until next time!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
I had my last sonogram this morning and it looks like we are all set for embryo transfer on Monday. Wow, that’s soon! I’m really looking forward to progress. I must say it feels like I have been in limbo for quite some time since our first cycle didn’t work. I am so at peace with whatever the outcome is. Granted, I am full of hormones right now and can cry on command, but still, the logical part of my brain is good with either a positive or negative pregnancy test. What will happen is they will transfer two embryos in on Monday and then nine days later they will do a blood pregnancy test to see if it worked. I’m thinking that might be nine very long days, what do you think? I’ll post again after transfer. Until then -- think sticky.
Makala Pollard is a Senior Marketing Specialist for Texas Health Resources and Stepmom to two boys.
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